A Calvinist arrives at St. Peter’s gates and sees that there are two queues going in.  One is marked “predestined,” and the other is marked “free will.”  Being the card-carrying Calvinist that he is, he strolls on over to the predestined queue.  After several moments an angel asks him, “Why are you in this line?” He replies, “Because I chose it.”  The angel looks surprised, “Well, if you ‘chose’ it, then you should be in the free will line.”  So our Calvinist, now slightly miffed, obediently wanders over to the free will line.  Again, after a few minutes, another angel asks him, “Why are you in this line?”  He sullenly replies, “Someone made me come here.”

With thanks to Michael Bird in his epic Evangelical Theology (excerpts and review to follow)